A moment in Autumn

A moment in autumn 

I sat at the top of the mountain (hill) and thought, yes, stunning. 

I knew this was exactly what I needed even before I got here, I enjoyed the satisfaction in knowing that I was right – a short hike in the woods, a sunny spot with a view. Perfect. And it felt even better knowing that I wasn’t at work. 

I could be. There’s always more people to call, always another sale to make. 

But I was at my voicemail limit and it was a perfect autumn day. 

I walked through the words and breathed in fresh pine. I reached the perfect one mile summit just in time for the shadows to touch the edge of the trees. 

There was still mostly sun,

I sat on a rock and took a sip of my water, settled in on my sun patch.   

The sun was warm on my face and the fall morning chill had long worn off.  

I watched a family with a dog take a selfie with the view.  

And the view was beautiful, with the leaves just starting to change and the sky a bright blue, the only cloud coming in a straight line from a single jet.  

I listened to a woodpecker search his way through a tree trunk, a car far off in the distance.  

I sat patiently on the rock, until the family left. The young daughter was over the view entirely and wanting to go to the playground.  

For a moment I was alone.  

I looked out to the distance of green, with splashes of orange and red. And the horizon far away. 

I could have screamed, released my current stresses and worries. But instead I sat.  This isn’t my screaming mountain (hill), and besides, my stresses aren’t worth screaming about anymore.

I’m stressed, but in the background noise, kind-of -stress.  My work is new and I’m starting to see the challenges, but it’s not difficult.  I sit at my desk, I make phone calls.  And because it was the last day of the month, the sales goals were looming. But it was a friday afternoon, no one was answering the phone and I was close to dropping dead of boredom.  So I left. 

I sent an email to my manager saying I needed the rest of the day, I’ll use up my few precious unpaid time off hours. And I left. 

Without guilt, without worry that maybe if I wait just another half hour, this person will call me back. I just left. This time is alotted to me so I accept it, gladly.  Without explanation other than I need the rest of the day (for myself entirely).

I put on a hoodie, logged off, and I went to my mountain (hill) and I sat in a sunny patch and looked at the autumn brushed leaves and it was spectacular.